can't sleep.

Assalamualaikum wr. wb...

okay people, it's almost 2 am in the morning, and i'm wide wide awake. i just can't sleep. a lotta things running in my mind now. i've been trying to sleep for hours but my eyes are wide opened. and now here i am, sitting in front of the family computer (because my laptop is being serviced) in the living room, watching devil's advocate (i almost forgot i have an english task about this very movie).

many things are running in my mind.
and some problems are too hard to tell.
i am in the lowest point of my self-confidence and my self-esteem, many things made that happen.
1. this diet thingy is starting to piss me off. i hate the scale for this. HUH.
2. i've been studying for UAS since days ago, but i still can't focus on what i am reading. i blame the logic task for this. HUH
3. i miss mas andri, yes i do. no matter what he did to me and what i did to him, i still miss him. everything reminds me to him. when i put my ipod on shuffle and maliq & d'essential's song coba katakan was being played, i remembered him. the same thing happened when i was listening to taylor swift's song you belong with me. when i saw police officers, i remembered him. when i accidentally was watching a football game on tv, i remembered him. when i read something about 'serigala terakhir' in the newspaper, i remembered him. everytime shanika plays jordin spark's song it takes more, as a sign of new message, i always thought it was him. and i hate the distance for this. and i blame the cellphone credits for this. HUH

i'm so not in the mood right now, i guess it's PMS. bad mood makes me mad of everything, dissatisfied, dissapointed, disoriented, lazy and unhappy. these feelings plus those causes above made me incapable to sleep earlier tonight. usually a phone call from mas andri would turn everything 180degrees, but it has been a week since he called me, he's busy. so now you know why i miss him so much right? i really want to hear the special ringtone ringing, taylor swift's song.

i hope tomorrow (i meant today, cuz it's already morning) will be a great day for me. i promised myself i won't skip my jogging sched, and my eating sched will be fully organized. and i've gotta study! i mean real study, not just random skipping pages.
i hope my mood will turn to good, so i won't be spending all day just laying on my bed just like yesterday.

ok, time to go to bed. it's 3 am now! bye!